I can feel it, I can feel it.
and I don’t like the feeling, it’s like the feeling when I went home away. The sadness conquers my whole system. Why is it that it is really sad to say goodbye to those places and person whom you felt the love and attachment? I am at this point in my life saying again ‘goodbyes’, how hard really this kind of situation is.
Today, February 14, 2019. Every moment was captured as part of my life’s timeline. We formally said goodbyes and gratitude to all who were part of our journey as SEA Teachers in the school where we have our internship which is SD Islam PB. Soedirman. Miss Nurhikmat, our very supportive teacher in the school together with Mr. Ehdy Sumarno, the Vice Curriculum send regards to us and thanked us for being part of the school. Even if the principal is not around because Mr. Ramdoni went in the governor’s office to receive an award, still they don’t let us be alone and they don’t waste the time they can accommodate us. We are so happy, we have received certificates as well as simple token. My whole being is jumping in overflowing happiness at that time. But, when we have our class visits, it tores me into pieces. I can see in their eyes that they don’t want us to go back in our country. Some lends their notebook with me and I will write my name and sign it, some is hugging me tightly, some tell me ‘no, you will not going’, some were crying, some wants us to be in their side always, some were asking me if where will I go because they don’t want me to be away with them. It’s just that, they want me staying for a long time with them. 😭 I started to cry, I feel guilty but what can I do? And the only solution for this is to tell them that I will see them again if I have money to come and visit them. 💔😔 but rest assured, I will never ever forget them, that once in my life, I have many kids loving me purely. For the remaining hours in the school, we bond with the children and talk to them to ease the hard feelings we are feeling at that moment.
On the other hand, as a way of saying thank you for the people who helped us, we gave simple tokens, an organizer notebook from MMSU, a coin purse which is made from Binakol and also a coin purse which is strawberry in design.
Then, the bond continued in the night, we had a small ‘salo-salo’ in the night with our dorm friends (Asih, Mamik, Fina, Daisy, Ratna, Ika and Eliza). We eat, talk and had a conversation together, laughing at silly things and we do simultaneously singing. It was really fun at first but when they went to their dorm, the difficult feeling of longingness attacks again, especially when Mamik hugs me tightly. 😭 This is our last day to have bond with them because they will go to the school where they teach and stay, they will just come back on Saturday. Oh, it’s really sad. Hayys. We exchanged numbers so that when we go back to the Philippines, we can still contact them.
In the end, Maybe there are people whom we met to be attached with us and later will be away with them but I believe, encountering this situation is all God’s perfect will and it has really a purpose.